


The Devil within

by Art_Writer_Alice, Sylcian_SPH_Legacy



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angsty Crowley (Good Omens), Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Caring Aziraphale (Good Omens), Comforting Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley is Satan (Good Omens), Hurt Crowley, Multiple Personalities, Other, Possessive Crowley, Protective Crowley, Top Crowley (Good Omens), Worried Aziraphale (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2020-09-27 18:35:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20412427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Art_Writer_Alice/pseuds/Art_Writer_Alice, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sylcian_SPH_Legacy/pseuds/Sylcian_SPH_Legacy
Summary: When Luzifer is done with tempting Adam and Eve to eat the apple, he meets his old friend Aziraphale again. However, the Angel doesn't remember him. Fearing, God told the angels something different on how he actually fell he gives himself a second Identity, first named Crawley. Then a lot of things happen in a short time. Crawley changed to Crowley and eventually locked up Luzifer in his mind. But for how long?





	1. 4004 bc - The Beginning

It was a sunny day when Luzifer reached the earth’s surface. He didn’t like digging through the humid stinky earth but it was the only way out of hell. And he didn’t know that he’d get right into the Garden of Eden. It was the most beautiful garden in the world. The plants were sappy and green, the sky always blue and the temperatures were very warm and pleasant. Here it all began. He didn’t even mean to do evil things today. He only had been very bored and decided to visit the earth’s surface. Every time he did, he discovered another place on earth. Some were very pleasant and some weren’t pleasant at all. The last ones were what he used to call hell on earth. Even so, he needed to fulfil the grand plan, showing god how full of failure the humans were. So he decided to make Adam and Eve eat the apple of the forbidden tree. It gave them the ability to judge over good and evil. It didn’t even take him more than two minutes. He observed them biting into the forbidden fruits and grinned inside of his snake body as they walked towards the wall. _Stupid humans._ He looked up the wall which surrounded the whole garden when he saw a small white-haired angel. Eventually, he decided to look after the angel as something was familiar about him.

Meanwhile, a sigh escaped the angel’s lips. He just gave his flaming sword to Adam and Eve. Doubt was eating him up alive. _Was it alright to give them a flaming sword from Heaven? _He just wanted them to be protected. Sure they ate from the apple tree but the woman was pregnant. A little human was growing inside of her. It was cruel to let them go without anything. When the wrath of God would fall upon them it would be better to be prepared. With a conflicted look he gazed at the silhouettes on the horizon awaiting the consequences of his actions. _Oh, may the Almighty forgive me. _He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn’t even notice the demonic presence until Luzifer stood right beside him, where he transformed back into a human shape, his wings spread. Which turned out to be a great idea. Because recognizing the angel he nearly fell off the wall. It was Aziraphale. His best friend, the angel he loved. Who thought he’d be destroyed for his deeds right now. Horror hushed over his face for a moment. Did Aziraphale know what he actually did or did he only know the version God had told him? _Does he even remember me? _The question whirled around inside Luzifer's head like a hurricane.

“That was a dead loss”, he murmured when finally discovering Adam and Eve in the great desert that lay in front of them. As soon as the angel heard the demon's voice something in the back of his mind was screaming at him but he couldn’t understand what it wanted to say. When he noticed that Luzifer talked, he gazed at him with a puzzled look on his face. It wasn’t the time to think about it now so he locked away the voice inside his head. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”, Aziraphale asked, trying to keep his voice polite and cold. But his eyes were as warm as always. The Angel knew he should have hated his opponent on sight. But for some reason, he couldn’t name he didn’t. He sensed something different about this demon. Apart from being surprised the angel even talked to him, a little hope glimmered within Luzifers eyes. _Could it be he remembers me?_ Searching for any sign to answer his question he looked deep into the angel's eyes. However, all he could see was slight fear alongside with curiosity and something he couldn’t define yet. “I said it was a dead loss.”, he repeated a bit louder, observing every little movement of the angel’s face, hoping to find some hint, Aziraphale remembered him.

A weird smile stretched now on the angel’s face. There was still a chance, the demon was going to destroy him. And like the fool he was, he gave away his only weapon. Of course, he’d still be able to fight in the worst case. Regardless it had never been his best ability. The demon might not look like he wanted to fight. But in the end, they still were enemies. “Yes I suppose”, he said, finally looking at Luzifer for the first time. He frowned a bit, as he saw an emotion in the demon’s eyes he couldn’t name yet, but eventually let go. “I’m Aziraphale.”, the angel said politely as ever and impatiently waiting for an answer of his Opponent. Which made the pain in Luzifer’s heart so strong he wanted to fall off the wall again. Aziraphale didn’t know his name anymore. He knew it the moment when the angel introduced himself. The waiting expression on the angel’s face told Luzifer that he wanted to know his name. He thought a bit about that. _I’m Luzifer. Leader of the rebellion. All I did was asking too many questions. But God might have told the angels differently. I can’t tell him my true name. For his own sake. _“Crawley”, He introduced himself with a slight grin on his face, focussing his yellow snake eyes directly on Aziraphale. The angel’s smile felt a bit strained now. Why in the name of God did this Crawley exactly want to talk to him? But after a while, his good manners succeeded over his doubts. “A pleasure to meet you Crawley.”, he said, then fidgeted while thinking about what to say or what to do. There had been no one who prepared him for such a situation and Crawley's yellow eyes that were still fixed on him didn’t help either. In an attempt not to feel totally awkward, he opened his mouth but hesitated before saying something. “So. What a- … were you doing?”, the angel asked. He had to admit, it was not his best approach. Still, it was better than nothing. He looked back at the de… Crawley as he tried hard not to flinch. He, an angel, wouldn’t dare to loose to his enemy. Or at least he hoped so. He didn’t want to hear another speech of Michael on how to be strong.

“Me…? Oh, they’d just say go upstairs and cause some trouble. Nothing really important”, Crawley mumbled, looking over to Adam and Eve again. Aziraphale stared at his opponent with an unimpressed look. “Of course. You are a demon.”, the angel muttered, “Obviously creating trouble is what you do.” _How could I have thought he’d be up to anything else?_ he added in mind, being a bit disappointed though. Crawley tried to ignore the pain in his heart. Some time ago he has been an angel just like Aziraphale. They had been friends. Best friends. And now the angel saw nothing but the monster that was going to kill him. “Although I think it’s a bit dumb to put a tree with forbidden fruits in the middle of the garden with a shield that says ‘Don’t touch’. Why put God the tree here? Why not on a mountain? Or the moon?”, he asked to distract himself. Crawley, as he now called himself in the upper world, enjoyed finally having someone to talk about these things. The other demons were either too dumb or not interested. Or both. But he still sensed that special flame of intelligence and curiosity which had always interested him about Aziraphale. Though he was a bit more cautious with his words, Crawley knew Aziraphale understood him. One of the things he loved about this angel. “Best not to speculate. It’s all part of the great plan. We can’t understand it. It’s ineffable.”, Aziraphale claimed, but some regret was to be heard in his voice. He wanted to talk about his doubts and his fear. And Crawley just put them into words. No one liked him in heaven and he was all alone. He didn't have friends which caused a strange hole in his heart. The longing was like a shining star. But no matter how desperately he wanted one, it couldn't be Crawley. No way. Demons and Angels can't befriend. _Aziraphale is right, _thought Crawley at the same time. The best would be not to speculate. Crawley only fell for asking questions. And even though he sometimes had doubted God, he believed in her after all. He didn’t hate her. He only wanted to be noticed. To be loved. As this thought ran through his mind he blinked at Aziraphale. He knew that the angel doubted his words. Yet he looked lonely. He had that very same expression as Crawley himself. But could they ever befriend again now that he was a demon?

Suddenly another thought struck his mind. “Didn’t you have a flaming sword?”, Crawley asked out of nothing. The angel looked at the horizon trying to ignore Crawley without success. _Oh Lord, there it is. Now I’m going to be punished. _“Er… I gave it away”, he murmured. “You did what?”, Crawley asked in surprise. The angel's cheeks were red and he couldn’t stop fidgeting. He suddenly looked at the demon and tried to explain it while moving his hands nervously. “They looked miserable and there are a lot of dangers out there! And it’s cold and she is pregnant! To let them go without protection, would be cruel! So I said, here you go, flaming sword, no need to thank me and leave as soon as possible… I really hope I didn’t do the wrong thing.”, Aziraphale sighed. The demon couldn’t help but understand him. If he was still an Angel he’d probably have done the same. He felt the pain and the insecurity of Aziraphale, which was nearly too much to bear for him. Crawley knew he wasn’t good at comforting others. Actually, no demon was. But at least he wanted to say something to make the angel feel better. So he gave his best to ban all the sarcasm in his voice and said: “Oh, you’re an angel. I think you can’t even do the wrong thing.” Aziraphale didn’t even notice the trace of sarcasm still there in the demon’s voice. “Oh, thanks. Thank you! It’s been bothering me so much!”, he said in relief. It was still bothering him a bit. The angel could perfectly see Adam using his sword to kill a poor lion. And even though killing was what the sword was meant to do, he didn’t have to like it. Still, he was truly thankful to Crawley, who blushed and had to smile when the angel thanked him. The angel was so nice and pure after all. On the other hand, the demon didn’t judge him and tried to help him which was much more than anyone had ever done for him so far. And that meant a lot to Aziraphale. He frowned a bit when he listened further. “I’m worried too.”; Crawley said a bit more serious “What if I did the right thing. Demons can get in big trouble when they do the right thing.” _Did the demon do the right thing? _It was hard to tell for Aziraphale. “I’m sure there will be no problem. You did cause us, angels, a lot of trouble.” The angel’s smile got a bit strained again while saying that. It was true after all. He failed at his job. No wonder no one liked him.

A little bit of warmth returned to Crawley’s eyes. “Possibly we both failed”, He claimed thoughtfully, “Would be funny if I did the right thing and you did the wrong thing.”, the demon added slightly grinning when thinking of that irony. Distracted by Crawley’s stunning smile the angel blushed before realizing what the demon said. “What? No! No, it wouldn’t be funny at all!”, he yelled. The demon stopped grinning at once. He was right, it wasn’t funny at all. Crawley feared it just as much as the Angel did. Even though his heart jumped when the angel blushed. Maybe there was a real chance for them to get along. “Oh, that weather doesn’t look good.”, the angel murmured when he was distracted by big dark clouds. Just at that moment lightning cracked in the sky and the first raindrops fell on the earth. When Crawley noticed the thunderstorm he pulled an annoyed face. He didn’t like this weather either. He never really trusted the water. Wouldn’t change much if it came from above. To be honest it made the water even more suspicious to him. He flinched when the first raindrops hit him. Aziraphale noticed it from the corner of his eyes and raised his wing above Crawley's head without even thinking. Nervously he fidgeted a little but didn’t move in fear of letting the rain touch Crawley. He tried to stare at the horizon and concentrate on the rain, yet the presence near him was too confusing. _Why does it feel so familiar?_ He couldn’t find a reason at all. Still, this was not as bad as he had feared first. Aziraphale would never admit it felt nice. The rain got more, though it didn’t hit Crawley any more. He looked up and saw the white wing protecting him from rain. Searching for security he stepped a little closer to Aziraphale. He wished he could have protected the angel aswell. One moment he thought about reaching for his hand and decided against it in the very same moment. He didn’t want the scare Aziraphale off. So they stood there side by side in the rain.


	2. 3004 bc - Noah's Arc

It was another day in hell. Luzifer was bored again. He wanted to see his angel. Nevertheless, he had to be careful. If Beelzebub found out he befriended with an angel, Aziraphale would be in great danger. While Luzifer thought about what lies to use on her, Beelzebub just entered the room. “Something is happening on earth, Lord. Shall I check it out?”, she asked Luzifer who had been playing with his flaming red hair until now. He stood on his feet at once and shook his head. “I will go and see myself.”, he said and made his way to the surface without hesitating. He knew some of the humans up there. And who knew, maybe he’d even see Aziraphale again. Thinking of that he started to grin happily. When he arrived on earth, in fact, something strange happened. Lots of animals entered a big ship. Precisely two of each species, one male and one female. It didn’t take the demon long to discover the angel he’d been looking for. “Aziraphale”, he yelled walking towards his friend. When he reached Aziraphale he noticed a little sigh escaping the angel’s lips. A lot of thoughts whirled around in his friend's head. Aziraphale had helped with the construction of the ship. Not much of course. He just made sure everyone on the arch would be safe. The angel wanted to cry. Noah and his family will be safe. But what about the other people who are going to die? He was a protector of humanity for God’s sake! It was right, some of them did bad things and deserved to be punished. Still, there were innocent animals and children who would die too. They don’t deserve it. He clenched his fists. Of course, he has been on earth for a while now and seeing the people die, somehow became natural. But to see God killing all these people on purpose broke his heart and he couldn’t do a thing about it. When he heard a familiar voice his heart jumped. “Crawley!”, he shouted, turning around with an enlightened face. The angel Didn’t know if he was actually happy. At least the demon would understand him. Right? He tried to smile but there was no conviction in it. 

“It’s Crowley now”, He said slightly smiling back. He noticed at once that something was terribly wrong here. “Crawley was so… groveling”, He muttered without really looking at Aziraphale who smiled gently, as Crowleys eyes were rather caught by the ship which stood in the middle of the desert. “Crowley, you say? It will take me some time to get used to it.”, the angel confessed. But if that is what he wants, I will use it. Crowley still wanted to change the subject quite eagerly. He wondered why one would need a ship in the middle of a desert. Maybe Aziraphale knew more. “What is this ship all about?”, he asked, “I wonder about this traveling zoo.” When Crowley looked at Aziraphale, the Angel seemed to be very uncomfortable about this topic. “Oh.. the ship.”, he stammered, thinking desperately of how to explain, “Well, you see, God is very angry with the people here. She said to Noah, a very nice man, to build an arch and take two animals of each species with him. He may also take his family with him, but the others will drown in the flood I guess. Only the humans and animals on the Arch will survive.” The doubt was clear to hear in his voice while Crowley listened to him in disbelief. “She drowns them all?”, he asked while watching the children running around and playing. He truly understood the angel’s dilemma. But then another thought struck his mind at once. “Not the children!”, he gasped, “You can’t kill the children… I’d rather expect us demons to do something like that.” The Angel flinched since he clearly heard the disbelief in Crowley's voice. Maybe the doubt in his voice had been a bit too clear. He desperately searched for the right words to correct the situation. “When all is done, the Almighty will create a new thing! A rainbow. To promise she won’t drown everyone again.” Of course, the angel understood the logic, but he didn’t have to like it, did he? When he heard of the promise, Crowley pulled a face. “How kind”, he said, not able to keep the cynism out of his voice. For the angel, it didn’t help at all. “We can’t judge God’s plan. It’s ineff… beyond our comprehension.”, the angel explained, “We’re just here to make it happen.” Right at that moment, Crowley noticed a white unicorn, running off. “Oi, Shem!”, he yelled, “You’re a unicorn is getting away. Nevermind. It’s gone. Luckily you still have one left.” Then he gave the Angel a skeptic view but didn’t talk anymore. He could see the angel doubted the plan. Though Aziraraphale was afraid of falling, he couldn’t be mad at him because of that. Falling was horrible. He still slightly shuddered thinking of it. He wouldn’t wish it to any other angel. He thought of anything to say, but his mind went blank in horror as he flinched from the first raindrops and remained silent. Fear caught him when he saw the children. He couldn’t let them die. 

Without thinking further he took all the children with him. The Angel sighed when he saw Crowley getting away. He couldn’t blame him for it. The demon probably went back to hell to stay safe and to protect himself from the water. One moment Aziraphale thought about going back to heaven too. But just the idea of the others celebrating Her deeds made him shudder. So he flew on the arch and waited for something to happen. In the meantime Crowley had brought up the children to the highest peak he could find. From here on he could fly them to the arch. The moment he thought that a great spring tide built up in front of them and took them by surprise. Most of the children could cling to the rocks but one was whirled around by the masses of water and crashed against the wall. When some of the water receded Crowley saw the dead body on the floor and rang after his breath. As the rain grew more he raised up into the sky. Maybe Aziraphale was still there and could help him. He flew over the endless masses of water, desperately looking for the arch. The time he finally spotted it his wings got so heavy by the raindrops he fell straight into the water. As he fell his last thoughts were about Aziraphale. Trying not to panic he closed his eyes. 

The Angel had no idea how long he stood outside, getting drenched in the process when suddenly something hurt him. He had no idea why, but he was feeling anxious as the pain in his heart was becoming unbearable. Before he could think about anything else, he took flight and looked around the arch. That was when he saw him. Crowley was here! And he fell straight into the water. Aziraphale flew as fast as he could and barely missed his best friend's hand. Without hesitation, he plunged after Crowley right into the water. Thankfully he caught him quite fast despite being underwater. Using all his will power, Aziraphale lifted the demon and flew him back to the arch. The angel hardly caught his breath when he started shouting at Crowley in distress. “I can’t believe you did this! Did you want to get discorporated? What sort of whim took over your mind, Crowley?” The angel was very scared. What if the demon got hurt? Crowley was the only one he could talk to. In a way, this was very pathetic, but the angel liked it to talk to the demon. He was lonely without him. At this moment Crowley coughed some water which brought the angel back to reality. His clothes and wings were still heavy being soaked through with water. He shivered even though he couldn’t feel the cold. His hands were clenched to fists and his eyes widened in pain. Tears fell from his cheeks but they didn’t stand out against the water. “I couldn’t save them. The children… they’re still out there”, he stammered while trying to get back on his feet. He couldn’t let them die. They were innocent children after all. But he got knocked off his feet again when a stabbing pain ran through his chest. He coughed hard and even more water along with some blood came out of his lungs. 

Aziraphale’s Eyes widened. The… children? Crowley talked earlier about the cruelty of murdering children. But the Angel never thought he meant it. Now the angel was feeling stupid. No, much worse than this. He was feeling hurt. He judged the demon and look where they were now. If he didn’t let his prejudice talk, maybe the two of them could have saved the children. But what about god? She still wanted them dead. The angel has been ripped out of his thoughts when Crowley tried to get up again to save the children. “Stop moving, you… Stop! You’re hurting yourself”, he cried. He hesitated a second then sighed and dried him and Crowley by a miracle. It wouldn’t help too much, but his miracles were under strict surveillance and this one was innocent enough. “On the highest mountain, you said?”, he reassured himself. Crowley nodded. Oh, may the Almighty forgive me. Refusing to think about it, the angel spread his wings and flew away. The demon could do nothing but looking after him as he tried to save the children. It made Crowley smile weakly. Too tired to even move he closed his eyes and fell asleep at once. 

The angel wasn’t afraid of water in particular, though there was an awful lot of it. Finally, He saw the mountain and on it the children, Crowley had tried to save. They were seven, all were of different ages. Seven! Seeing them he didn’t wonder why Crowley was so tired anymore. Aziraphale landed near. He tried to convince them that he was a friend, talking about his black-winged friend. It was enough for them to trust him. The youngest was dead, another one was coughing and the second oldest was badly hurt. This was going to be tricky. He took the children who were hurt in his arms and let the others get a grip on him before he flew away. Still, he had to leave the dead baby where it was. An innocent baby! How could anybody decide to… no, he couldn’t think it further. With all his Courage, he flew over the masses of water which were still rising while the rain was getting stronger and stronger. A sudden wave hit him by surprise. When he had passed the wave he realized, one of the children let go of him and fell to his death. The arch was near now, so the angel put all his last efforts into the landing. Being too tired to coordinate his wings properly, he crashed on the deck. It took him a second to recover. Only enough for checking on the children to discover the two in his arms died too. Heartbroken he gave them back to the water. Crowley woke up as soon as he heard the wings of the angel. Still feeling a bit dizzy his eyes widened in horror when he heard the angel crashing down. He ran outside seeing Aziraphale giving the two dead bodies to the water. “May you rest in peace”, he muttered under tears. The angel stumbled towards Crowley, hugged him tightly and rested his head on the demon’s shoulder after he dried the children and miracled some blankets. “I’m sorry.”, he stammered, “I couldn’t… I tried to but… the others were too… are… They didn’t make it. I’m sorry.” Crowley just stroked his head softly, desperately holding his tears back. “It’s alright, angel.”, he only whispered, “You did your best to save them. Thank you.”

Then he hugged the children and kissed each of them on the forehead. “You’re safe now. I’m so sorry. We couldn’t save the others. We really gave our best.”, he said with sincere regret trying to keep a steady voice. The angel couldn’t stop crying. He heard the demon reassuring the children. Still, he just couldn’t. This night he lost so much it left a hole in his heart, almost too painful to take, and his faith thin as a leaf. He barely recognized how Crowley gave the blankets to the children, sitting down on the floor. The feeling of being pulled into the demon's arm, who silently cried made him flinch a little. It made him slightly shudder when the demon reassured and comforted him. Is this possibly part of her plan? Crowley wasn’t a common demon. The angel was sure of that. He was caring. Heaven always taught him, demons were awful, dangerous, even cruel at times. But not Crowley. Maybe God wanted to show that they could do good things together instead of fighting each other. No, he wouldn’t lose his faith now. A simple Angel like him would never understand her way. There must be something he couldn’t see yet which made all of this mess worth it. He jumped a bit when he realized he lay still in the demon’s arms. So comfortable. He pushed Crowley away with a sigh and spread his wings. Then he asked the demon to do the same. And he did. They gathered all the children together and gave them as much warmth and love as they could. The angel had the feeling of finally belonging somewhere. He still cried but was too tired to think of anything else. So he took Crowleys Hand and fell asleep like that. This gesture comforted the demon and gave him some security. His heart was beating faster but his breath normalized and he stopped trembling. He smiled slightly and stroked Aziraphale’s head to comfort him. The children were fast asleep and so were the angel and the demon. 

After a while, Crowley woke up and went on to deck as quiet as possible. Thoughtfully he gazed at the sun rising when two shadows appeared in front of it. First, he thought they would be birds but as they drew near they went too big to be birds. He sighed when he acknowledged Dagon and Beelzebub. This couldn’t end well. Hopefully, they wouldn’t find Aziraphale and the children he thought before his consciousness seemed to fade out. “Beelzebub. I thought my orders were clear.”, Luzifer said angrily. He had taken over instantly when Crowley had recognized the two demons. “Traitor.”, Dagon only said and fear ran down Luzifer’s back in his last moments of consciousness. Then Dagon hit him as hard as she could and Luzifer's sight went black. He felt like being underwater still realizing how he was carried away. No! Angel! Aziraphale! No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get a tone out of his mouth. It ripped his heart apart, thinking of how Aziraphale would wake up finding out he was gone. But they couldn’t know, Aziraphale and the children were still on the arch. Otherwise, they would have sent more demons. They need me to find him and the children. And I thought humans were dumb. He swore himself to never tell a thing about the angel and the children. No matter what they’d do to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a long phase of silence here is another chapter. Besides having a lot of stress I read through it 3 or 4 times before I was okay with submitting it. And here it finally is. I can't promise the next chapter can be submitted faster. Little appreciation here because my partner Kan-Kan is a beautiful inspiration and does a great job, which is stunning me over and over! I think we got content for 6 to 7 new chapters and I can't wait to rewrite it!  
I hope you all had fun with this chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> Hello :) You just found my first work on this platform^^ So I'd really appreciate some feedback *reaches hot Cocoa and pink glazed Biscuits* You'd say: 'Oh Cookies' but we call them Biscuits ;)


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